[align=center]A Black Mesa Tale Part 1[/align]
jerry Siggs considered himself a geekofalltrades but was better known for just being an OldDirtyBastard. Fortunately, this was one time Lord Grievous Patonki didn’t need his help. He figured GuitarJim could simply bring his Ibanez Raminator to his Mont_Blanc residence, since he had Houston Security Officers on hand, and could meet him on the second Level for lessons. He was a much better choice than just Someonerandm.
Wearing his shifty PJAMA he went downstairs to clean up his Bloodshot eyes and grab something to eat. baconeggs, a Cup o Joe and raw_bean Soup sounded good as well as the new Frozen Cham treat his kids had told him about. Unfortunately, the brokenfridgehing prevented him from considering adding the Chocolate Milk that Da Milk Man had delivered so he passed on the extra treat.
Turning on the stove he reached for The can of raw_bean Soup but mistakingly grabbed the Jethrosoup instead. What a mistake that would prove to be. Grabbing a RandomSpoon from the drawer, for use with TheSuperNova microwave he had just purchased, he noticed a bur and a-dot of Fungus on the handle.
That was the last straw. If Luciel couldn’t do a better job cleaning than this then she’s just got to go! She’s always watching that stupid animal channel CatzEyes93 with that sudpuzzer host JamesKane who thinks he’s MrSnaztastic when in actuality he’s just Mr. Someguy and a pfannkuchen_gesicht to top it off! If he was really smart he would have reached out to one of his own show’s sponsors for help. Dr Perky and Dr. Karamazov could have gotten rid of that crudface condition without a problem.
I’ll deal with her later, he said to himself as he proceeded to turn the temperature on the microwave from FireTime all the way up to Omega_Absolute. This was, unfortunately, precisely opposite of what the Jethrosoup instructions called for and soon a cloud began to appear from the oven. In reality, it was MarshmallowRadiation filing the room and before he knew what was happening he was screaming Imonfire!!! just praying that Bathroom Security would hear him.
GuitarJim had just arrived at the front Door. Hearing an ungodly scream he ran to the source only to find Lord Patonki’s prize DiePoente cookware burned and on the floor and what appeared to be some type of a large fowl laying beside it. It was a darkone, not a Winged One, had a huge Ballsopt on the top of its head and lay motionless.
Lord Grievous Patonki was off to eternalness. His Collision with fate brought him what he had searched for.
A place to rest…
a place of solace…