-not really rage but can’t post this on happy topic or general chit chat cause it is abit rage.-
today I go to social security for an appointment on disability. I am 24 freaking years old and yet I am already useless to the world. This sucks in every way i can. And it got me thinking in my life so far I have done almost nothing yeah sure I am 24 that is to be expected but then you look at fact that I am mentaly handy capped and well all hope goes down the drain.
To anyone that wants to know, I am autistic, schizoid, manic depressive, and a diagnosed psychopath. I literly profile like a serial killer to some people which is a bit strange to explain when some one catches onto my personality flaws. I am so flawed that where I live says yeah we want him away from other people and he can not work with other people (hence the disability, which I am locked into).
So that leaves me here at 24 years old knowing that my life offline is only down hill from here, and my life online is just messed up. that said there is some good in my life, In my life so far I have managed to help do voxel work for a game (running with rifles, seriously 1/5 of that games weapons are my work… for base game not DLC, the DLC is done by another mod team), I do RPG maker work for a specific comunity which I am not mentioning here though anyone with a brain can track down who I am… I don’t hide shit, and some how I have gotten contacts with game devs despite the fact I am a no one who jsut posts bad ideas pretty much everyhwere. I guess when you fire shotgun at a dartboard atleast one pellet hits bullseye.
My life seems to be strange, fucked up, and broken. and yet I spend most of it in one room infront of a computer where no one really knows much about me. I vent to random people online and more then a few people who are my friends online know alot more about me then they want to. hell the one comunity I am really apart of sees me as normal even though they know that I am one bad moment away from blowing my brains out if I forget my medication.
life is strange, I needed to vent. this post has no meaning but read into it what you want.
on an unrelated note, I want me raging furry tag back where houndeye is. that was fun. oh well I will just rage about not having that. (even though I only had it for what 2 days when the original rage topic was made)